Life has turned totally tipsy and not in that happy feeling after a couple of tequila shots way, but in that rather unnerving uh-oh, what is going to happen next kind of way.
A couple of years ago I decided to give landlubbering a try again and truth be told, I should have probably not been so foolish since I've learned my lesson before, but I plunged ahead regardless to prior knowledge. Accordingly, it didn't go so swimmingly well and I've been floundering around ever since.
About a year ago, in the midst of swimming headlong upstream, a most unique occurrence happened ~ I acquired a dog. I only acquired a dog in the sense that I now take care of it, but not in the traditional sense of choosing a dog, wanting a dog, nor looking for a dog and dog ownership. This dog decided it was in his best interest that I be the one and only human on planet earth worth his constant attention. Now this little guy is great, fantastic, a joy to play with, and very well trained. However, he's also extremely, highly, completely, utterly, and totally dependent on my existence. What does one do on land with a dog such as this: a dog that could care less about food, toys, treats, the rest of the human population unless I am visibly in the room and obviously staying there?
That's an honest question, as I have yet to find the answer.
So a year after acquiring said dog, I'm doing what all lost children do that have a new child and need help; I've moved in with the best built in baby sitter, Mamaw. How long will I stay? I don't know. Life is limbo.
What I do know is this:
A couple of years ago I decided to give landlubbering a try again and truth be told, I should have probably not been so foolish since I've learned my lesson before, but I plunged ahead regardless to prior knowledge. Accordingly, it didn't go so swimmingly well and I've been floundering around ever since.
About a year ago, in the midst of swimming headlong upstream, a most unique occurrence happened ~ I acquired a dog. I only acquired a dog in the sense that I now take care of it, but not in the traditional sense of choosing a dog, wanting a dog, nor looking for a dog and dog ownership. This dog decided it was in his best interest that I be the one and only human on planet earth worth his constant attention. Now this little guy is great, fantastic, a joy to play with, and very well trained. However, he's also extremely, highly, completely, utterly, and totally dependent on my existence. What does one do on land with a dog such as this: a dog that could care less about food, toys, treats, the rest of the human population unless I am visibly in the room and obviously staying there?
That's an honest question, as I have yet to find the answer.
So a year after acquiring said dog, I'm doing what all lost children do that have a new child and need help; I've moved in with the best built in baby sitter, Mamaw. How long will I stay? I don't know. Life is limbo.
What I do know is this:
- The last job I had on cruise ships no longer exists (again).
- My long time job (15 yrs) in the Arkansas symphony is teetering on non existent.
- I've got a dog with severe separation anxiety that hasn't improved with any method tried.
- I don't have a giant nest egg of funds to support myself indefinitely.
So, after pursuing a temporary job, a long term flexible job, and other random wandering ideas that have slammed shut rather effectively in my face, I've finally accepted my pre-term midlife crisis.
Since I was a child I have wanted nothing more than to play music for a living. I've done that successfully and unsuccessfully ever sense. The scene has changed and I've barely kept up with it until now. Fewer and fewer cruise ships want classical groups and the major one I worked for years ago, now tells the musicians what to play, when to play, and how to play the music. The following of supporters I amassed was from getting to know my audience each cruise, playing what they liked and how they liked it. Performing as a robot doesn't win the audience on cruises (as the reviews for the new groups have shown) nor is it a desirable way to work for me.
Symphony orchestra on land have been my bread and butter between cruise ship gigs. These orchestras are financially suffering like all the others, and the remedy for that is to hire more people locally even if they're not professional. It saves thousands of dollars to not pay mileage and hotel costs for so many musicians to travel in for the concert and rehearsal week. Unfortunately, I don't want to live in any of the cities that would require me to stay. Nor would the income generated by performing there support me in any way living locally instead of traveling from hotel room to hotel room (no rent to pay). So the job I've loved and had for so long is no longer really able to hire me except on occasion.
What in the world am I going to do?
With the support of friends and family, I've chosen to make a drastic change. I have no idea what the outcome will be and if I'll be successful, but I'm going to give it the best shot I can.
From full time musician to travel writer and tour guide.
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| At the Beach! |
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| Dali Museum Tour |
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| Hard at work in a local coffee shop. |
